In the last couple of weeks, I’ve read three stories from Salisbury that caught my interest. Two from the Post and one from the Magazine.

From the Post: “Library Notes” (Sept. 25) and “After dropping in at the library, squirrel needs rescue” (Sept. 27).

From the Magazine: “On the Air” (October).

“Library Notes” first. David Lamanno wrote, “Public libraries have three main missions: to inform, to educate and to entertain.” Let’s talk about the entertain part. So David, “Where is the entertainment for people over 17 when it comes to your movie selections?”

I would love to share with you David and the rest of the staff of RPL, the story about the squirrel was quite entertaining. And I imagine quite expensive.

Now, in the magazine story “On the Air” on page 34 it read, “Initially, he (David Whisenant) had to learn to like country music.” Just for a moment there I felt like Aaron Church, why because, reading that made my heart happy. But, then on page 37 the story read, “His headphones stream psychedelic rock.” All of a sudden I felt more like Merle Haggard did in 1978 when he sang “I’m Always On A Mountain When I Fall.”

Here goes a few country songs I picked out for David Whisenant to enjoy. The staff at ROCO Public Library can dedicate them to the “Save the Squirrel” program.

From the 1950s — “In the Jailhouse Now,” Webb Pierce. “I’m Moving On,” Hank Snow.

From the 1960s — “Please Help Me, I’m Falling,” Hank Locklin. “Waiting In Your Welfare Line,” Buck Owens.

From the 1970s — “Don’t Keep Me Hangin’ On,” Sonny James. “It’s Just a Matter of Time,” also by Sonny James.

From the 1980s — “Lookin’ for Love,” Johnny Lee. “Have Mercy,” The Judds.

Here’s a few more. “The Race is On,” George Jones. “I Fall to Pieces,” Patsy Cline. “Let’s Fall To Pieces Together,” George Strait.

Hold the line! It’s 10:45 Wednesday morning on Oct. 4, and I just got the call! My cousin Kay just called to tell me Loretta Lynn has gone home. So let’s do a couple more songs in Loretta’s memory. “You Wanna Give Me a Lift” from 1970 and “I Wanna Be Free” from 1971. Thank you, Loretta. You were always my favorite.

Now to the squirrel story and some questions. Where were Don and Greg? Someone told me they saw two men that day (Monday) that walked like politicians, policing up the park grounds of balloon litter. They said one was wearing loafers. Someone else said they heard two men that talked like politicians maneuvering around boxes, bins and carts in a Dollar General store. She thought they were looking for Halloween candy and that the one with the heavy complexion couldn’t get through the aisles, but the short one flattered her because he could.

Where were the preachers that day? Someone said they were all too busy sending out e-mails and texts to choir members and organ players about the special services on Wednesday and they “didn’t have time.”

Why didn’t the rope trick work? Someone said Aaron Church must have finally untied Bob Pendergrass’s hands and the rope was probably too old and rotted, so when the squirrel tried to climb it, the rope broke.

What is an arbored saw?

I called the “Tool Man” for this one. He said it was actually a hole saw not an arbored saw.

I asked him, “Are you saying ‘Whole Saw’ like in whole wheat?”

He said, “No, It’s H-O-L-E, hole.”

“Oh, I said, like corn-hole?”

He said, “Are you trying to be funny?”

I told him, “No, corn-hole is one of the games people play.”

He said, “I know what corn-hole is and now they are doing it at a lot of different churches.”

Another paper-reader I talked to said he wanted to think that squirrel was up in there trying to find an R-rated movie.

No matter what his or her reason was, it’s time to pay the fiddler. So here goes one final tune for today. “Mississippi Squirrel Revival,” by Ray Stevens. “That squirrel went berserk at the First Self Righteous Church.” Melissa’s squirrel went berserk for Bob Pendergrass and Aaron Church.

Why did the ROCO squirrel bury the can of fish? Because Tuna spelled backward is A Nut.

Keep on smilin’.

Whitey Harwood lives in Rowan County.