When I first read “Rowan is an Example for all NC” by a RoCo native, I was thinking about Anne Murray singing “A Little Good News.”

Then I read it again and thought about George Jones and Tammy Wynette with their “Two Story House.”

Oh, what splendor was in the Native’s story. But, like George and Tammy, he’s got his story and I’ve got mine, too.

Some people will remember Porter Wagoner singing this song in 1965. Other people will remember Tom Jones singing it in 1967, and some other people won’t know what I’m talking about, but I’m using it for my story.

It’s about a man that was having “Sweet Dreams” but when he woke up, he realized things were different “Here in the Real World.”

This ole boy, I think he was from Landis, got this song stuck in his head. For three days and nights he couldn’t get this song off his mind. He finally said, “That Song Is Driving Me Crazy” and went to the doctor. The doctor said, “Well, what’s the name of the song?”

The man answered the “Green, Green Grass of Home.”

The doctor told him, “You’ve got the Tom Jones’ Syndrome!”

The man asked, “Is that very common?”

“It’s Not Unusual,” the doctor said.

The other writer had to use (Review) only three recent editions of the Salisbury Post to look for “The Good Stuff.”

Well, I only had to use one paper to find these three headlines and they were all on the front page of the Tuesday, July 11, 2023 edition.

1. Man Arrested After Running Over Girlfriend.

2. Parents Charged After Infant Found Unresponsive.

3. Man Charged For Kidnapping, Battery, and Assault On Family Member.

Wow! I feel like I need to take a break after reading and writing about those shining examples of the sad and sickening situations that the people who work and play here have to live with here in good ole RoCo.

Let me share my story about someone else that left RoCo and moved to Raleigh.

About four years ago my family drove up from Raleigh to visit with me for a couple of days. We were in the front yard playing baseball. Jake was batting. I was pitching, and Shama and Ella were playing infield and outfield. We had been playing for about 30 minutes and not a single car went up or down the road.

So, I looked over at Shama and said, “There sure ain’t much traffic out today, is it?” Well, Little Jake, at six years old, lowered his bat and said, “Mama! Mama! Pawpaw said “ain’t,”

He was looking for his mother to correct me, but she got tickled, and said, “Well, that’s alright, baby. We’re in Rowan County now and it’s OK to say ain’t up here. We just can’t say it when we get back to Wake County.”

I don’t need to go anywhere for outstanding baseball. I’ve got it right here in my front yard.

And I know what the score is by listening to the radio for over 70 years. I got it from Bill Anderson when he sang, “Liars One, Believers Zero.” You’ll get it too if you bend over in front of the feckless leaders of RoCo.

Have you ever heard the song “I Wouldn’t Live In New York City” (if they gave me the whole dang town) by Buck Owens?

I asked Shama if she thought she would ever move back to Rowan County? I got me an ear full!

She said she wouldn’t move back here if they gave her that great little town that celebrates “The Hottest Day of the Year” Day, the West “Sides” Mall, the Faith 4 th of July Parade, The Bell Tower Park with its new flagpole, Fame, all the balloons hanging in the trees, all the Dollar General Stores, all the Confederate flags, all the Rainbow signs and all the R-rated movies that are not in the Rowan County Public Libraries, but should be. Sorry, Landis, she didn’t mention you. Not a word.

But I’ve heard from a lot of people that Landis is a good place to live and pay. Oops, I meant to say to work and prey.

I’ve not seen the painted rocks, but I’m satisfied they add beauty.

But I have heard Tracy Lawrence sang “Paint Me a Birmingham.” I turned the Superstar on to that song, and I can guarantee you it’s a thing of beauty when he sings it to a packed crowd everywhere he goes.

Here’s another thing of beauty I witnessed in Salisbury. When we pulled out of Harris Teeter onto Brenner Avenue, the red light caught us at the corner of Jake. There stood a man with a cardboard sign.

My window was down, and he walked over toward me. I asked him if he needed something to eat. He said, “No, I need enough money to buy me some smokes.” I said, “Sorry, Pal, but you come to the wrong window,” and rolled it up.

I put in a tape by Luke the Drifter and listened to “A Tramp On The Street.” Here was a man without a pot or a window, but he was honest.

I thought of all the people in RoCo that have everything that money can buy but wouldn’t know the truth if it jumped up and slapped them in the face.

If everyone was as honest as the cardboard man, we could all sing “Everything Is Beautiful.”

The other writer might have some folks “Almost Persuaded” that “It’s Such A Pretty World Today,” but “I’m Not Ready Yet” to “Keep On The Sunny Side.”

Since “Things Aren’t Funny Anymore,” I think I’ll just stay here and wear “My Own Kind Of Hat” and consider it was “A Good Year For The Roses.”

If you are still with me, I’m about to wind down.

Here’s my last three “shining examples” about the wild and wicked ways of people that live, play, and

work in “Woe-An” County:

1. Please Don’t Ever Forget This – Erica Parsons lived and died in Rowan County.

2. Please Read This – China Grove Man Charged With Sex Act On A Dog. Monday, April 24, 2023.

3. Please Watch This – Full Video: Rowan County Commissioner Craig Pierce Arrested For Driving Impaired.

Then the next time you hear Tom T. Hall sing, “Old Dogs, Children, and Watermelon Wine,” you might come away with a different point of view.

This quote came from a movie: “You cut the ears off a mule, don’t make him a horse.”

Keep on Smilin’.