By Ashlie Miller

Christmas Eve night, after the candlelight service, a drive through neighborhoods with pretty lights, and hot cocoa accompanying a shepherd’s meal of bread, nuts and cheese, our family finally arrives home late in the evening. Upon arrival, the five children, ranging from a small six-year-old boy to a couple of lanky teens, change into comfortable jammies and pull as many blankets, pillows, cushions and mattresses as possible into our snug living room. Tonight is the night — the night before Christmas!

Each year, I ask my older ones if they still want to sleep by the tree on Christmas Eve, and every year, they give a whole-hearty “Yes!” It is that feeling of joy they long to experience, unmatched by any other regular night of the year. When they are young, the joy is about waking up and seeing if that deeply desired gift is under the tree. I think as they get older, they look forward to the experience of joy that we share as a family. They, too, enjoy watching little ones open their gifts. 

Anticipating joyfully in a jolly season is not particularly difficult (waiting with patience is another story). But enduring with joy when things are painful can be more than a mere challenge. Seasons of grief over a loved one or lost dream, sorrow over a strained relationship, uncertainty over a current situation of health or provision are just a few of the many challenging circumstances that can stifle joy.

Sometimes, we are tempted to think these expressions of joy in such situations are not authentic to who we truly are. We are told to express our true feelings — “don’t hide how you feel,” “you be you.” For Christians, I wonder if we have traded “authenticity” for obedience and living a peculiar and set-apart lifestyle that is a sweet-smelling aroma to Christ and to others watching from the outside. How does Scripture direct us?

• Consider it joy when facing trials because the process brings steadfastness, character, hope and completeness (James 1:2-3; Romans 5:3-5). We can be joyful in the process by trusting the outcome for our wholeness. 

• Paul, who wrote much of the New Testament, endured many sorrows and affliction, but his perspective was upward focused — “Sorrowful yet always rejoicing, poor yet making many rich; as having nothing yet possessing everything” (1 Corinthians 6:10). Difficult times with the proper perspective make way for rejoicing and can bless others along the way.

• When we abide in the presence of God by reading His word — where He makes known the path of life — and diligently obey, we experience the fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11; John 15:1-11). That close abiding ensures that our circumstances do not shake us because we dwell securely in God, which brings joy in troubles (Psalm 16:8-9).

Where do you find yourself this holiday season? Is it a place of finding it easy to rejoice because things are going well? Or is it a painful season of growth that can point to wholeness, an opportunity to reset your gaze and perspective upward, or a time to revisit what it means to abide and dwell securely even amid uncertainty? In any case, you can rejoice if you know the One who provides fullness of joy.

Ashlie Miller is wife to Chad Miller (pastor of Mission Bible Church in Charlotte). They raise their five children in Concord.