Ashlie Miller: Is hospitality a cultural or personality trait?

Published 12:00 am Saturday, September 9, 2023

By Ashlie Miller

Hospitality is intriguing because it is not always the extroverts who have displayed it so well to me and my family. True, biblical hospitality is always more than a serving action; love accompanies the action, not grumbling (1 Peter 4:9) or a mere sense of obligation.

I recently interviewed several ladies from either church or friends who I have witnessed bear this trait remarkably well. Only a couple are self-professed extroverts, while some consider themselves quite shy.

While some of the ladies, like Lizzy, grew up in cultures (like Southern culture) or family environments that did foster hospitality, others did not. What is natural for some is very unnatural for others. So what is the connection? How are extreme opposites in personality and culture willing to lean into their natural gifting or push past their comfort zones to show hospitality?

Lizzy recognized that her mother kept the door open to their home for friends, church groups and those who were alone during holidays. Now, Lizzy naturally carries on that legacy today.

Likewise, Ellie, a church charter member, recalls the early days of the families attending church needing a place for events. God had blessed her with the perfect home for hosting such events. Rather than keeping that goodness to herself, she sees it as a tool to serve others.

Lydia also uses her gift to uniquely connect with an ever-growing congregation and learn the names of visitors and new attendees. She bakes the most delicious bread each week and surprises select members and visitors alike with a loaf to take home — and we each love it when it is our week to receive the blessing!

Anna’s awareness came about differently, yet in a way that many of us keenly have become aware of in recent years. COVID and the lack of connection gave her time to contemplate how to serve others and grow in Christ. While she opened her home to immediate family, she recognized that God was now prompting her to open that door a little further to others.

During a recent discipleship session, Lacey clearly articulated the “why of hospitality” by sharing that pushing ourselves beyond our comfort zones reflects Christ, who healed the lepers and invited children into His presence. Even when we feel a reservation or are uncomfortable, we must remember we represent Jesus. The world — sinners and saints — need us to show Him to their lives.

So what about you? Do you naturally want to serve others but have been keeping it to a select, very close few? Or, despite your personality being more introspective, even shy, you feel a drawing to step beyond comfort boundaries to glorify the love of Christ to others. There are more obstacles to consider, but we will ponder those another week.

Ashlie Miller has become a social introvert, thanks to her extroverted husband in ministry and the grace of God. You may contact her at ashliemiller.com.

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